Posted by: forfreedomalone | 09/01/2016

Leaving the toy shop empty handed.

When I was a child we used to go to the same place every year for our holidays.
We loved it and looked forward to a month every year in familiar surroundings, with the sun and the sea as our companions on a daily basis.
During our holiday we always went to a toy shop in another village. This too was a much anticipated treat in the days when children got a gift for their birthday and another for Christmas, and that was it.
One year I remember climbing the stairs and entering the shop to be confronted by this enormous teddy bear, sitting on a high shelf in front of me.
One look and I was in love. He was beautiful and something in me just longed to have him.
I wanted that bear, but I was too young to really understand about cost. I just knew I would like that bear; I had no understanding of just how much he would be.
Someone must have seen my face on spying the bear because they brought him down off his shelf for me to see and hug, but this made the situation worse because now we had started a “holiday romance”! He was nearly the same size as me and I was besotted.
Although I had lost my heart to a teddy bear and had no concept of the cost, I also knew that asking for things was not done. We would be given a gift from my Gran as a special treat while on holiday. We gratefully received what she chose, but we did NOT ask.
I knew he was too much to even dream of having. I just knew it and there was no point in making a fuss or wishing or getting too attached. He was WAY out of my league and I knew we would have to part. So I went on a hunt for a smaller toy to show enthusiasm in. I really couldn’t find one, but I did try. The last thing I wanted was to be greedy.
We spent ages in the shop and my brother got something, I don’t remember what.
I didn’t get anything.
I was heartbroken.
This had never happened before, we were always treated the same.
I must have made too much of a fuss about the bear and now I was being punished for being the very thing I was trying to avoid. I must have been greedy.
Just as I turned the first bend in the stairs, on the way out, the lady in the shop called me back. “I think this is yours,” she said and pointed to a huge paper bag on the floor.
I was confused.
What could the paper bag have to do with me?
I pulled apart the top and peeked inside.
There was Ted.
My Gran had bought the bear for me!
I was ecstatic!!
I could not believe that the bear was really mine. He had a string which, when pulled, made him talk and the first thing he said was “Give me a bear hug, hee hee”. I did as he commanded.
Today, over 40 years later, he sits in my bedroom……minus his voice, as I stupidly washed him, but that is another story.
Will we trust our precious, perfect, loving Father right now, when we feel let down and that we are leaving the toy shop without anything?
Will we trust him when we feel he hasn’t understood just how much this person/thing/calling/healing etc means to us?
Will we trust him, no matter what the circumstances seem to be?
Will we obey his voice when he calls us back?
Or will we huff and leave the toy shop empty handed?
If we really know him; who he is, not just what he does; we will trust him no matter what, we will respond to his voice when he calls and we will rejoice in him, even if the toy we long for is withheld.
HE is the prize.
HE is the one we are privileged to have.
Everything else is surplus, extra, over and above.
If you are struggling right now with circumstances remind yourself that the giver is all you need, for he has promised to give to you ALL you require, in every circumstance, abundantly.

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